This may come as a bit of surprise, but I hate Renee Zellweger.
After three dirty martinis at a downtown Minneapolis establishment this past Friday, I blurted out to Pegatron that we should visit my parents. No less than 48 hours later, we were on the road to visit New Ulm. It was a nice surprise for my mom and my dad was more than happy to supply us with authentic Mexican fare to reward us for the long haul from Eastern to South Central Minnesota. The pollo was good, the conversation was light and soon we were off to see the first big budget movie set in our lovely rural hamlet, New in Town.
The story was bad, but even worse was the acting of Renee Zellweger. Zellweger fails at this unbelievably simplistic character. Also, to be honest, she's got a weird face and I don't want to look at it anymore. In addition, I couldn't understand how this corporate executive could lack common sense. My cubicle neighbor recently visited Thailand and didn't bring a coat. You know why? She has a fucking clue. Thailand is warm. Hell, it's downright hot. So, why bring a coat, right? Same goes for you, Renee Zellweger's character. You're going to live in Minnesota during the Winter months. Bring a coat. Don't be an ignoramus. Ms. Zellweger was imbecilic at best. I got my parents to go and see a movie for the first time since Toy Story and this is the shit you serve up? Fuck you, Zellweger.
Now, I know this movie was meant to be a comedy and people loved Fargo with it's ridiculous Northern Minnesota characters, but really? I've never felt more like a country bumpkin than I did leaving that theatre. Sure, we have the stereotypical, down-home buffoons in New Ulm and some of them end up at the 3M, Kraft or AMPI plants for employment. However, there are a similar amount of simpletons in the Twin Cities and everywhere else, in fact. Also, this movie was shot in some Canadian town, so the real city of New Ulm didn't even get props while they were being destroyed by Hollywood. Yeah, they mention a local landmark (the Glockenspiel) once at the beginning of the film while the women "scrap," but after that, it's all rural cliches and old-timey gags. Even JK Simmons couldn't save this one.
Rather than buying a ticket to this movie, just fill up the car with gas and visit New Ulm. I fear that if you see New in Town, you'll never, ever visit.
The Annotated Beukemix 2020
1 year ago
4 comments:
I went and saw a movie this weekend and it had the "New in Town" preview. I'm not even from New Ulm but I now know how people on the east and west coasts think of us. Totally oblivious to the outside world.
Thanks for the warning to not waste the money on the film. I had my doubts. Reading on it seems that Holywood folks and other general clueless people think it's an ok film, whereas anyone in the know about the Midwest feel it's another Holywood film taking potshots at us. I went to school in New Ulm. Hermann the German was a next door neighbor. If they can't even spare the expense to bring a camera crew over to film some outdoor and panoramic shots of the town, their lack of class shows. And a bit of a discussion of Schells beer vs. the big name brands wouldn't hurt either. You can do better, Holywood!
Thanks for the warning. I haven't been to New Ulm in 18 years. I think I'm due for a visit.
Funny, I watched it last night and I saw weird stuff going on in Zellweger's face so I googled it and landed in your blog.
I don't fear places based on how Hollywood portrays them. I'm from Argentina. Hollywood portrays my country as anything but what it really is (crib of drug dealers, commies like Che, arrogant soccer players, sexy tango dancers, etc.) So, don't be afraid that people will ever want to visit New Ulm because of this crappy movie. No one cares. Of course it's an exaggeration.
And if they care and they believe that there's a place in Minnesota named Saint Olaf where everyone has Scandinavian roots, or that everyone in New Ulm is a simpleton... then that's their problem. They are the ignorant ones.
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